Tantallon Victoria 11 Hardgate 0

Starting 11 vs Hardgate 14th December 2013


It’s a long time since I wrote a match report. Pretty poor from me tbh. Here’s a number of excuses why it’s not been done. Feel free to pick the one you like the best to settle your mind about it and then we can all move on and I’ll promise to do them every week:-

  • I thought it was to be done for next week
  • Jan was steaming and spilled lethal Polish vodka on the Tally server
  • The dog ate my keyboard
  • Tank ate my keyboard
  • I forgot the site password
  • Tank ate the site password
  • I thought someone else was doing them
  • Tank ate the person who was supposed to be doing them

Right that’s the excuses out the way – let’s be honest.

We haven’t been hitting the heights of earlier in the season and the last time we played Hardgate from a commanding position of leading 3-0 in that game we hit the self destruct button in classic Tally style. A 3-3 draw was the result and in the games that followed we crashed to two defeats against team’s called “Villa”. As you can imagine I spent many hours lying in a darkened room as a result of this and cringing every time Collymore came on Talkshoite. Then our wonderful manager signed a right back who is an Aston Villa fan…


Football comes in cycles though, eh? The good times are only so sweet because the bad times taste like pickled nettle soup. Saturday was to be the day of our Christmas Party – we had our friend Matt Danks, the Charimon of Tipton Town coming up for the weekend and a lad from Leicestershire travelling to see us while groundhopping in Glasgow – we needed a win to get back on track.

The weather wasn’t too bad setting up the goals but the wind soon got up and the rain came down heavily. It was brutal stood at the side of the park and the visitors had the advantage of the wind. We had chances but it was important to keep things together at the back. Step up Chris Reilly who had a magnificent 45 minutes winning everything that came his way with his partner (not his lover though #FastShow) Stephen “Laurie” Cunningham also in majestic form. Our Seal loving full back Rab Martin has settled in well and chipped in with a few acrobatic clearances.

We had chances but didn’t take them until we took the lead with a McQuade penalty late on in the half. After four attempts to get the ball to stay on the spot the future West Bromwich Albion striker slammed the ball home for 1-0.

Jan did his magic at half time – doing a couple of neat card tricks, doing that one where you guess which cup has a ball under and sawing Marky in half on the touchline – before sending the boys out to work for the three points.

It had been a pretty even game first half but an avalanche off six goals in eight minutes ensured the points would be going to The Tally. Wilson struck first before McQuade netted twice for the hatrick and 23 goals for the season. Two goals for Super Gav came either side of an own goal which Wilson ridiculously tried to claim. Our eighth goal of the game saw an assist for stand in keeper The Tank who launched the ball the length of the field to Proctor who deftly flicked it into the far corner for his second goal in two games.

Big Danks was on his third Tally night out in a row and had only two wishes – “A Big Mo goal and a Thommo goal”. Mo struck minutes later beating the keeper from around the penalty spot and Thommo right after rifling the ball into the top of the net from outside the box. There was only time for young Eddie Muirhead to do a Mark Burchill, coming on for our talismanic striker he scored his first goal for the club to make it 11-0 tally and a record win.

A fantastic result then in terrible conditions – the team showed real passion and desire thoughout. It’ll take some result to ever top this one and every single player who played deserves credit for their efforts for their wee fitbaw club.

The night out was fugging mental by the way. I mean seriously insane. If you could win the Champions League based on ability to party then we’d win it every year. Team of lunatics. Especially that Chairmon biff. #ffs #sake

Man of The Match – Jimmy Wilson

Goals – McQuade (3), Devlin (2), Wilson, OG, Proctor, Morrison, Thomson, Muirhead.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, December 17th, 2013 at 6:06 pm and is filed under Match Reports. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.

Comments are closed.